Earth: Population-No Telling How Many Nosy Liars

It’s a damn shame to write so soon but I have a question.  When did everything going on in each of our lives become the business of those people that stare at you and watch every move you make just to have something to do?  When did these so-called people begin to think they should step into something that is nothing?  I am not talking about friends or other people that love and care for us.  I’m not talking doctors, counselors, or who you may go to church with (well….maybe sometimes…if I went).  I need some comments below this post, everybody!  I can understand if it affects the other person or people, but if everything is perfectly fine and someone is doing everything they should do in this life without harm to themselves or anyone else, then those other people need a hobby.  They could take up watching Jerry Springer or Maury, which are people just like them, only the guests are inviting them into their shit.  Humans are packing in like sardines everywhere.  You can open your door usually and see something (even if it is nothing and none of your business).  Keep it to yourself if it’s just gossip or a lie.  What about someone deliberately opening a door to your house without your permission that is not welcome?  I had a step-grandmother we called Hattie Gail.  She always wanted to know what my uncle was doing, his kids were doing, what we were doing, and where her purse was (my sisters would hide it); so to all the Hattie Gails out there, mind your own business and keep your hands to yourself.  Last time I checked, even we sardines have the right to prosecute trespassers.  I don’t want to do it.  I don’t want to judge, but when a violation of ones’ property is messed with in any way be grateful for the same grace I spoke of two posts back.  I know I’ll need that grace to forgive my mouth and mind (I always rant first and then think later when bothered by those Hattie Gails out there waiting on me.  Please weigh-in on this for me.  Are you bothered more by the gradual loss of personal space?  Do you miss just trusting someone without putting them through tests first?  Do you see the pain that is causing others to fear society because of a few lies or steps or ignorant stares?  I do, but I am still going to enjoy myself.  What do you do when you need uplifted?

 

Playing in jeep in the summer helps me!

Lynyrd Skynyrd always make me feel better!

Life Lessons from Your Local Bootlegger

Let us change gears here!  The latest youth should be aware you couldn't go but alcoholic drinks without making long trips and only a limited number of cases.  They changed the law in regards to the amount you could by but it didn't male the trip any shorter!  Poppy (my Grandfather) didn't care.  He was the one they counted on in so many neighboring towns.  Maybe it was the fact that Poppy was young and forced on the front lines in WWII on Normandy Beach on D-Day.  Whiskey jugs were hid all over the countryside down in old stumps. If he was thirsty, he knew where they were.  Maybe it is how he coped with war.  I just know when any one of hundreds tell me stories about him now I hear two sentences; these being "I bought a lot of beer off ol' Ralph." and "Nell wouldn't sell it.".  You woke Poppy up after 8:30 pm, especially to charge it, he wouldn't either.  Once it led to a "picket your local bootlegger" strike.  They had signs saying that and picketed until a few minutes later when Poppy shot a sign out of Tom's hand.  To this day, Tom don't care and said he knew he'd have been dead if Poppy wanted him to be.  His children, which includes my mother, and Granny had it rough living with him.  I know that and believe they have let it go now.  I wish they could see him like I always have as 'Poppy's Baby'.  Everyone I speak with about Poppy and Granny both always speak with deep respect, admiration, and affection.  I veraciously learn all I can about where I came from.  I want to know what I am made of so I am confident moving forward.  I have received the same gifts from everyone that Poppy and Granny and my parents got, as I am an heir to this strange inheritance of loyalty.  I make faces like my dad, forget like my mom and sisters, stand my ground like Granny, and take care of business like poppy. Oh, and poppy taught me a mean game of poker and dominoes. I know what people think; they learned those games too, but when your teacher has won thousands in cash and new cars, then you tend to learn not to lose EVER! I needed to know where I came from before I went ahead. I'm only 34 but old school and raised so. I love fresh paper, the smell of new pencils, and the feel of a real book in my hand when i read.   My teenager can't address an envelope and didn't know about stamps. My 8 year old is hooked to electronics the same as the teen. I can't stop advancement but I have the voice to express my disappointment.  My tattoos tell my story of love, loyalty, and faith and family.  My tattoos will never define me.  I will define them, so never assume.  I will forever use the gifts and gratitude I've been given.

My Demons and Unconditional Love and Grace

I was brought up in church.  First, I went to a Baptist Church and then Pentecostal.  When I moved in with my fiancé I was introduced to but did not attend Catholicism.  Each left me with beliefs I still have to this day and each left me questioning things regarded as true or important in each one.  This has left me to develop my very own, unique relationship with God.  Each organization has too many holes in them, therefore organized religion does not appeal to me at this point in my life.  I see people every day that go to some church or another that are good people, but I feel their judgement (not Christian), I see their anger towards those that made mistakes and hear the words they speak of condemnation as soon as the mistakes are made (also not Christian and, technically a lack of forgiveness and mercy), and I notice how erratically they work to "follow the law" and do works by their own hands to build themselves a sure-fire ticket to heaven.  I am in no way putting anyone down.  These are hard-working people with faith in God and do exactly what they feel they should and need to do according to what they were taught to believe.  I enjoy listening to a good church service.  I read my bible and try to live by it.  I own devotionals and crosses and pray. 
My point being through all of this discussion about church and why I do not go is really simple.  People have been too concerned with doing in this tragic world but not concerned enough about listening, flying under that protective wing that gently reminds us we are none of us better than another and we should be thankful for the unconditional grace and love that no one really even deserves without Him.  I can't throw a stone.  Can you throw a stone?  Have you never made a mistake?  I have.  Everyone I know has.  I bet you fucking have!  Did you see mine? 
I live amongst the demons that haunt many believers out there.  I curse, honestly, quite often when I am not around others.  There have been dark days that required more than a pint of ice cream and a spoon to survive; but that's survival.  I have days I cannot control the craving to escape from my own mind.  I never stop thinking.  Still, I fight anger so deep that, when triggered, could compare with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder.  Forgiving is hard but forgetting is harder than anything I could be asked to do.  What do you do when you feel cornered?  What do you do when you realize time won't go in reverse?  Anxiety attacks my mind and tells me nothing will turn out right and I can't do anything.  It attacks my body with stress hormones, mixing with the "coping skills" I used.
All I know is no one can know.  You are given choices but those don't come with blame and excuses.  They only come with consequences, and the rest that you can't control will be dealt with as it comes along.  Only my spiritual relationship and grace and unconditional love with God make me realize that goodness, protection, and peace are always within me, no matter how many demons knock at your mind (because they attack your mind since the mind runs everything else) in order to tempt you to cope with chaos that surrounds your life.  I will never deserve it.  I will always be grateful, though.  I am grateful that after years of feeling broken and knowing I was irreparable, there is no human broken.  We are whole, complete, and already righteous people; and I know I am forgiven. 
I am not trying to be a damn preacher.  I just wanted to share what I learn sometimes.  You don't have to believe me.  You can ignore me.  I don't really give a shit.  I just hoped someone without a hope might gain a new perspective.  Not a Christian?  Think of it as self-help.  I have friends that don't believe in God but want that peace.  That peace is grace.  The grace is from Him.  Love is the most powerful emotion; therefore by filling yourself with love will accomplish the same effect only without the stigma of being called "grace".  As for me, I cannot deny God, so I will call it grace.  May you find this grace that is given, definitely costly, but free to anyone, so please be grateful!